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So in my last blog post I briefly talked about two events that happened in the month of September and on how this year would be different. Well it was. For the 1st time in about 8 years since the accident happen, all those emotions and physical reminders that would gone on were finally gone. No crying or being withdrawn from the world. Not even feeling like it should of been me. They were all GONE. Being able to finally grieve in my own way and totally allowing God to work truly change my whole attitude about how I see this experience. Yes, I will still feel sadness for the families who lost their sons and some emotional pain, but now I know how to handle it better with what new insights. By the way, this new insight also was applied to feeling sadness when it come to losing the baby and that the baby would of been born in September. So that the update from the last post.
Now it is October and I am officially 31 years old. I can now say that I in my early 30’s. I had one of the best birthdays ever. I have some of the greatest friends that helped me celebrate and I love them all . When I was younger my mom would give me a party but no one would show up. As I got older my birthday was celebrate at an Acteens event with some friends I knew from camp and even some of my counselors from camp. Then when I got married my views on birthdays got better and even my kids at work celebrate my birthday.
Being 31 is cool. I still get carded and the parents of the kids I work with still think I am in my 20’s. So how do I keep my self young these days? Well I have started going to a Bible study that a sweet friend of mine (I will call her J) is doing with some college girls at a school here in Huntsville and it has been good for me. I really like the way J teaches and the girls are cool. The only down side of this is that the study is at 8am and in order to be at work on time at 9am, I have to leave about 15 mins early, so I miss the good stuff. I don’t like having to leave early but its good to know that they welcome me and are glad that I am even there with them.
Well thats all for right now. Next month is going to be crazy and I can’t wait =). Will write more later.
Until next time
Well it is now September and this blog is now 3 years old. Within these 3 years, I have only missed 2 months. When I first started this, I thought I would not keep it running, well I guess I am doing pretty good.
Usually around this time, I write about certain events that happen in my life during the month of September such as the van accident in 2001 or the fact that we would of had our 1st child in September 2007 but I have a different feeling this year. One of the things that I am working on even harder this month is how I handle my memories emotionally. Usually I tell myself that I am going to have a good day and not think about it, but then I give in and just breakdown. One thing that I am learning is how yes it is okay to have these memories but it is the way I handle it with Gods help. I want to be able to let go of the emotional pain, but I don’t know how just yet.
So this is where I am now. I do feel this month will be different and I know that I need to be ready and willing to allow God to take the “dates” and all emotions that comes with. We shall see.
Well until next time
So my brain is fried and I wanted to be silly to keep me from going crazy so here are two of just some of my favorite things.
The Letter People – Mr. M (Yes I know I have post this one before but it’s my blog and I love it)
They Might Be Giants – Never Go To Work (7 days of the week)
Okay, I love this song so much that I teach this song to my kids at work in SIGN LANGUAGE.
Until next time
